Working woman versus Housewife

Money is the only reason to choose a working wife

The most common misunderstanding among the people, especially among those having a materialistic approach, is that a lady working in a government department, a private company or a multinational corporation is to be regarded as a working woman, whereas a lady who isn’t working in such departments or companies, but is doing all the household tasks from dusk to dawn tirelessly like cooking, washing, taking care of children and many other such jobs, is called a non-working woman or housewife.

Can we call a lady drawing a monthly salary a working woman and the one making our life easy, comfortable and pleasant a non-working woman? No and absolutely never. If we make a review of the daily routine and needs of a home if it is to run smoothly, we come to a conclusion that it is a woman who has made it run smoothly and with utmost success.

After a man has completed his education and also has got a good job in the public or private sector, his next priority has always been to marry a good girl. Among many criteria fixed by intending grooms for choosing a woman as a wife, one of the most important is whether to marry a working woman or a stay-at-home housewife. His own choice, the wish of his parents and the opinion of his close friends or colleagues directly have an impact on his final decision about marrying a working woman or a stay-at-home housewife.

It can be undoubtedly said that the rising inflation and the skyrocketing prices of essentials, becoming more expensive with each passing day, are compelling today’s youth to look for a match with a working woman, but there are certainly other reasons also because of which they prefer a working woman over a non-working one. Sometimes a government employee or an officer in government department regards it as an insult to choose a non-working woman when he finds his own friends or colleagues marrying working women. Living a luxurious life, having a better standard of life and maximising one’s desires is forcing almost every individual to seek ways for a good income from all available means. Marrying a working woman is one such means to increase one’s income to meet one’s expenses.

However there is also a good percentage of people who, despite being in government service, prefer to marry a non-working woman. For this they have their own reasons and aspirations. For a good service at home and living their own comfortable and stress-free life, they prefer to a have a nonworking woman staying at home.

Though at the time of wedding or choosing one’a life partner, one feels delighted to have a working woman for a partner but after some time things make one realize that he hasn’t taken a good decision. In a joint family, often the situation takes an ugly turn and mostly the couple feel worried when the working daughter in-law doesn’t receive a good cooperation from her husband’s parents and other in-laws.

When the lunch, dinner and two times tea for the husband and in-laws gets late due to the known reasons of the daughter in-law, everybody in the family gets worried and sometimes force the daughter in-law to say goodbye to her service.

Due to the over-busy schedule, the working couple faces many problems and issues both at home as well as outside the home. There is a common saying that “money can’t buy everything”, so a working couple with a materialistic mind, intent on making wealth and gathering all luxuries for their life, always find themselves lamenting in the end.

A working woman may not be able to manage her children the way they should be. After coming back from the school when the children find themselves alone in the house and wait for hours together for their parents, their personality isn’t developed properly because parents’, and especially the mother’s, love, affection and presence is a must in the early few years of the child’s growth and development. The strong and humanistic fabric of the family gets altogether shattered when parents, children and siblings don’t get required time in expressing their problems or issues and discussing about the proper way out so that each family member doesn’t feel alienated. At many instances it has been found that the aged and ailing parents of the working couple were either found dead in their own rooms without being noticed by any family member or were taken to hospitals by the people other than those duty-bound to do so. The social life of the working couple too gets affected due to their over-busy schedule. They can’t reach their loved ones, near and dear ones or relatives on the specific occasions.

Due to the over-busy schedule, the working couple faces many problems and issues both at home as well as outside the home. There is a common saying that “money can’t buy everything”, so a working couple with a materialistic mind, intent on making wealth and gathering all luxuries for their life, always find themselves lamenting in the end.

On the other hand a stay-at-home housewife, who always serves her husband with utmost care and honesty, takes care of husband’s ailing and aged parents and manages her children with true spirit of a mother, is regarded as a successful woman by all in and outside the family. A non-working lady can best serve her husband, manage the home and her social life too remains intact. The family members of her home, her neighbours and relatives unanimously praise her for the extraordinary skills she shows in managing the home and taking care of every aspect of family life.

One more important aspect is that the working women often become victims of depression and mental trauma while their non-working counterparts often live a happy, prosperous and contended life.

Rayees Ahmad Kumar
Rayees Ahmad Kumar
The writer is a columnist and teaches at Govt Secondary School Anderwan Ganderbal, Indian-Occupied Kashmir

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